Red Havoc Bad Cat (Red Havoc Panthers Book 3) Read online

It wasn’t L-O-V-E yet, but she’d just arrived at the first letter.

  Chapter Six

  Did Eden understand what she had just done?

  Barret’s fingers itched to touch the small stone that pushed against his denim pocket just to make double sure it was safe and secure. She’d thrown his rock into the forest when he’d tried to sabotage them, and then she’d rewarded his affection by giving him one with a more hopeful meaning instead. She’d basically told him she believed in him. She did! What else could it mean that she would point out that he was capable of being nice?

  And now they were here, walking side-by-side through the Red Havoc Woods like a normal couple getting to know each other. This was a moment he’d never in a million years thought would belong to him.

  “I didn’t get presents for a long time,” he admitted. God, it was so hard to say those words. “When my crew…well, after they were gone, I was on my own a lot.” He cast Eden a sideways glance to gauge her reaction. His upbringing hadn’t been a normal one like hers. He needed to figure out when he was being too much so he could dial it back and trick her into staying longer. Her lips were downturned and her eyes full of sadness, but she wasn’t running yet. So he shared more, just to test her a little bit. “One day I was acting out. We were eating at this burrito place, and Kaylee brought her cub to meet the crew for the first time. Bentley. That’s her son’s name. Anyway, he reminded me of me when I was a cub because he didn’t have a pride or a crew for a long time. It started scratching at all these stupid memories I have to keep tucked away, and I was trying not to give in and Change, so I was complaining about being hungry. I was mad that Kaylee had a cub, mad that Bently would be a part of us, mad that she was building a family with Anson, when I have no shot at having a family ever. But that kid…he listened to me panic about food, and he gave me a bean.”

  “A bean?” she asked, her moue turning into a slight smile. God, she was stunning, hair all wild, eyes trained on him, unafraid of the monster that sat just beneath his surface.

  Barret chuckled. “Yeah, a single black bean. He was trying to share, but all I could do was sit there and stare. It hit me that it was the first present I’d gotten since I was a kid when my dad gave me a shotgun for my tenth birthday.”

  “What did you do with it?”

  “The shotgun? Shot up every glass bottle and tin can I could get my hands on from age ten until now.”

  Eden giggled this pretty, tinkling laugh. “No, I mean what did you do with the bean?”

  “Well, I tried to eat it, but Anson was a mega-dick and slapped me in the head and made me spit it out.”

  Her giggle bubbled from her chest, and he reveled in the sound. He’d made her do that. He felt like the fuckin’ king of the world right now. “Everyone was staring and laughing, and I couldn’t pick it back up without looking like a weirdo, so I had to leave it on the table in the restaurant. It was just about the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.”

  “And then today I gave you a present.”

  Face stretching into a smile, he nodded. She got it. She got where he was going with this without him having to say anything else. Eden was a smart girl. It made him happy and sad at the same time. She saw deeper than he expected her to, but it also meant she would leave him sooner. Smart girls didn’t fall for broken boys like him.

  Eden was getting shy as they walked through the woods toward the Red Havoc cabins. He could tell because she kept looking down at her shoes in between the times she braved looking him directly in the eyes. And her smile was different. It was steady and sweet, and she kept letting her hair fall forward in front of her face as if she wanted to hide that pretty color on her cheeks from him. He didn’t like that, so he reached over and tucked the wavy strands behind her ear. Shocking him to his core, she grabbed his hand and squeezed. And just as he thought she would let go, she intertwined their fingers and held his hand like she didn’t mind the oil that clung to him from working in the shop. Or the rough callouses on his palm, or the disproportionate size, which was way bigger than her petite hands. He made sure to keep his grip extra gentle so he wouldn’t crush her bones to dust. He’d always been too big and rough, but Eden deserved the effort not to accidentally squish her like a grape. Out of all the people on Earth, he wanted to murder her the least.

  Just touching her settled the tension that constantly zinged through his body. She was warm, funny, and normal, and for the first time in his life, he wished he could’ve survived what happened to the Four Deadlies. He hadn’t, though. The boy he was had died, and in his place a monster had been born. And now he was full of regrets because a pretty girl like Eden, who made his heart pound and his dick throb and his head orbit around her, deserved better than what he’d become. He’d become survival. She needed a steady man.

  “What do you do for fun?” she asked.

  A lady like Eden probably wouldn’t appreciate the answer “Kill shit,” so he gave her a second-place response. “Making moonshine is fun. It’s challenging, kind of like chemistry, and the extra income doesn’t suck.” Plus making the real hooch wasn’t exactly legal so that made it even more fun.

  “Only one hobby, Barret?”

  He shrugged. “I run the auto shop and, outside of that, trying not to kick my crew’s ass on a daily basis is a full-time job.”

  “Well I have billions of hobbies, so are you ready to be wowed by my rich life?”

  Silly bird. He was wowed by literally everything she said. She didn’t even have to try. “Wow me.”

  “First of all, I’m pretty good with construction paper…” Her voice faded as his ears pricked at the sound of the Red Havoc Crew.

  Could she hear them? Eden showed no sign of noticing the argument that had broken out between Anson and Jaxon over a hockey game that had been played last week. Idiots. They were so fuckin’ loud and they were taking away from Eden’s words right now. She spoke on like she couldn’t hear them, and he thought maybe snowy owls couldn’t hear well like big cat shifters. Her lips were pretty when they shaped words. She enunciated well, like smart girls did.

  Damn, it was hot out here. He tugged at his shirt to let air hit his stomach. She was talking about her hobbies—crocheting, yoga, and brewing her own small batches of beer in her garage. So fucking cute. And normal. There was a hundred percent chance he would fuck this up. Why was it so hot out here? Maybe he should Change. No. Be cool.

  “And the hops are what make the beer…” Eden rambled. She was nervous. Her hand was shaking in his, and he didn’t like that.

  She’d been hurt before…rejected by that chode-hair who didn’t want her touching him. What the fuck was his name? Marcus. That dickweevil deserved a fiery death. Eden was beautiful. Her platinum blond hair lifted at the ends in the wind, shining in the sun like a ptarmigan’s feather in winter. Her eyes were more gray than blue today, but not just a single shade. They were darker in the middles and went lighter, branching out with subtle color changes. From farther away, they were the shade of storm clouds, but right here, they were more like the shiny silver back of a minnow in a stream. He wished she would look at him longer so he could memorize the tiny details in the color of her eyes.

  Why was she shaking? When a shadow passed overhead, she hunched and glanced up so fast she was a blur, showing her shifter speed. For a split second, there was fear in her eyes, which had turned a striking silver color in an instant. A snarl rattled up his throat as he watched the hawk above them, floating lazily on the wind currents, probably searching the forest floor for dinner.

  Eden was squeezing his hand hard, and she smelled faintly of terror. He couldn’t help himself and pulled her against his side, draped his arm over her shoulder, still holding her hand right over her chest.

  “You’re safe here.” He said it like she was safe in Red Havoc territory, but really, he meant she was safe with him. Like all the dumbasses in his crew, he would protect her just the same. If they got his fealty, this woman got his utter devotion and the p
rotection of his body as long as she stayed here.

  Eden let off this little sigh…this soft, cute, tiny, fucking boner-inducing sigh as though she believed him. And then, like he was a man and not a monster, she rested her cheek against his chest as they walked.

  He’d done it. He’d tricked the smart girl.

  He wanted to trick her forever because he’d never felt a connection like this. He bet her snowy owl was gorgeous, just like her human side. He imagined his green-eyed panther walking under a massive snowy owl, her wings outstretched, bathing him in her shadow from above, catching wind currents like that hawk had.

  “You’re slowing down,” Eden pointed out.

  Smart girl saw too much, saw everything but the monster, so he admitted, “I don’t want to go back yet. I’ll have to pretend I don’t want to fuck you in front of them.”

  Eden eased back and looked up at him. Her full lips were puckered in the cutest fucking little frown he’d ever seen. “Why?”

  “Because they’ll read too much into it.” And give him shit for the rest of his life. “And it’s none of their damn business.”

  Now her frown was deepening, making little lines around her mouth. She eased out from under his arm and walked away into the clearing in front of the Red Havoc cabins. She wasn’t even shaking her ass for him as she walked.

  Confused, Barret stood there with his arms out, palms up. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” Eden said over her shoulder. She didn’t slow at all. “I’m fine.”

  Ew. Those two words made his stomach curdle, but he couldn’t figure out why. Okaaay, if she said she was fine, she was fine. Crisis averted and shit.

  Barret followed after her, but she sped up, which only spurred on his primal instinct to chase her like she was prey. Fucking sexy prey that he wanted to eat. Out. That he wanted to eat out. He pushed his legs into a speed walk, but she tossed him a challenging look over her shoulder and started jogging toward where the crew was sitting around a bonfire. Why was chasing after her turning him on right now?

  They both skidded to a stop near the fire. Everyone was staring at them with matching scowls.

  Anson asked, “Who are you, and why the fuck is Murder Kitty chasing you?”

  His boy, Bentley, sang, “Anson said fuck for the third time todaaaaay.”

  “Boy, are you counting? And don’t say fuck!”

  “Four,” Bentley announced.

  His mother, Kaylee, snorted and tried to keep a stern face as she laid into her son for saying “fuck.” Jaxon was lying on the ground where his mate Annalise, aka the psychotic panther named She-Devil, sat feeding him grapes like a cabana boy. The Red Havoc Crew alpha, Ben, was flipping ears of corn on the grill while his mate Jenny had her hand in his back pocket and was whispering something probably perverted-as-fuck into his ear. And Raif, their son, just threw a bug into the fire. Or a booger. Barret couldn’t tell from here. At least Greyson wasn’t here. He wanted to kick that dick-pimple in the taint most days. He’d been a grumpy beast of a shifter lately, and it made Barret want to kill him. Not Barret’s fault. Greyson’s.

  Why was everyone staring at him? Even Eden. God, her lips and hips were distracting. He couldn’t decide which one he wanted more on his dick right now.

  “Dude, do you have a boner?” Jaxon asked, lifting into a crunch position as his mate settled her legs under his head.

  “Probably. She’s hot. Why are you looking at my dick, LVP?” Barret retorted.

  “Stop calling me that,” Jaxon snarled. “I’m not the least valuable player. You are.”

  “You’re getting fed grapes by a lunatic like you can’t even feed your grown-ass self. L. V. P.”

  Eden let off the tiniest giggle and then pursed her lips. She cleared her throat and asked, “Are you going to introduce me to everyone?”

  Barret looked around at everyone’s stupid, expectant faces. “No, why?”

  “You would be waiting your whole life for those introductions,” Kaylee said in a tired voice. “He has no manners. I’m Kaylee, this is Jenny and Annalise…” She went around the circle introducing everyone. Snore. “You obviously know the resident Barret the Barbarian.”

  When Annalise and Jenny laughed, Barret wanted to throw dirt, glass shards, and dung beetles in their fruity beers to punish them. Girls were so annoying. Except for Eden. She was funny and sexy and tough and she wore red bras and she did a siren song for his dick that called it to attention every thirty seconds and made him feel like a pervert and he liked her a lot. He wanted to touch her. Just a little touch to settle his annoyance with the village idiots in his crew. Just a little brush of her back. There. He stroked his fingers down her spine, and her face went completely slack as a tremble worked its way up her body, growing bigger and bigger until it landed in her shoulders and she gave off a soft, sexy noise. Were her pupils dilated? Now he was annoyed that the crew even existed because he wanted to bend her over that empty pink lawn chair by the bonfire and fuck her relentlessly until she was screaming his name.

  “Barret!” Ben barked out.

  He ripped his gaze away from Eden’s treasure box. “Huh, what?”

  Ben was staring at Barret like he’d lost his mind. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

  “I think you mean what the fuck is right with me. That answer would be ‘everything.’”

  Eden gave a single laugh that was so loud it echoed across the clearing, but immediately clapped her hand over her mouth. Her eyes were dancing though, so Barret could tell she was still grinning. He liked making her smile, but he couldn’t figure out why she found him so damn amusing. None of the Red Havoc crew ever laughed at how hilarious he was. Eden, apparently, had a sense of humor that matched his own. Ten more sexy points go to her.

  Eden cleared her throat and spoke up through her still lingering smile. “I’m Eden, and Lynn invited me here. I’m staying with her for a while until she recovers.”

  “Recovers?” Anson asked. “I’ve seen zero improvement from the time her deadbeat mate left until now. She tries to literally kill me any time I’m within two hundred yards of her hermit tree.”

  “It’s a tree house,” Eden said, stubbornness tingeing her voice.

  He liked how protective Eden was over Lynn, but Barret didn’t like when she was upset and grew suddenly desperate to turn her darkening mood around. “I’m gonna feed you my meat.”

  “That’s a gross way to put it, Barret,” Jenny reprimanded him.

  Barret shrugged. “I bought the ribs. My meat.”

  Jenny jammed a finger at Barret and looked utterly baffled when she asked Eden, “Do you like him? Like…is that your thing? He’s level-red-weird. I’m concerned.”

  “Uuuuh…” Eden murmured, eyes wide.

  “She totally likes him,” Anson said. “Look, she’s not even flinching away from him and he’s been petting her like she’s a stray cat for five minutes.”

  Barret stopped stroking down her spine. Oops. He hadn’t realized he was still doing that.

  “Smells like pheromones,” Jaxon said around a mouthful of grapes from where his head lay in Annalise’s lap. “Good to see you again, Duckie.”

  Eden scrunched up her face. “Don’t call me that, or I’ll bring up all your childhood nicknames, Wormy-Toot-Toot.”

  The Gray Back grizzly shifter threw up his hands in surrender, but he was still smiling. For some reason, Barret wanted to kill him, as usual.

  “You’re from Damon’s Mountains?” Ben asked.

  “That I am. I work for Damon, actually. He’s my boss.”

  “Well that’s fucking terrifying,” Anson muttered. “We want zero trouble with the blue dragon.”

  “Aw, he’s not so scary,” Eden said with a wink at Jaxon.

  Jaxon pointed at her and said promptly, “Lie. He’s a people eater. I’ve seen him devour ashes so many times I would rather chew my own arm off than cross him. Duckie here just sees the good in everyone. It’s annoying actually.”

&nb
sp; “Take that back,” Barret growled. She’s perfect. He wanted to say that so bad, but Eden would run away if she discovered how infatuated he already was with her. God, his panther wanted to claw out of his skin and bleed Jaxon just for calling her annoying.

  “Take what back?” Jaxon asked, lifting his head to glare at Barret.

  “Call her names, and I’ll rip your innards through your mouth hole. Take. It. Back.”

  Jaxon sighed and plopped his head back into Annalise’s lap, then opened his mouth like a baby bird waiting to be fed. She dropped a grape into his gaping maw. Barret viciously fought the urge to kick him in his stupid Gray Back dick and make him choke on the fruit.

  Jaxon chewed with his mouth open, smacking loudly. “Fine. I take it back.”

  From the shadows of the nearest cabin, Greyson asked, “Why do they call you Duckie?”

  Barret was used to Greyson pretending he was a damn ghost and hiding in dark corners so he wasn’t startled, but Eden jumped hard.

  God, he just wanted to touch her! He wanted to reassure her she was safe with him, but everyone was staring like he and Eden were the main act of a circus, and the crew was already giving them shit, and he hated everyone but Eden. And Bentley and Raif, who were now playing on the edge of the woods. Jaxon had his knees bent and spread where he lay, and Barret had to clench his fists to fight the still chronic urge to dick-kick him. Eden kept looking at the sky, setting his panther on edge, and Ben was burning the corn. When Eden began shifting her weight from side to side as if she didn’t want to answer the question, Barret got dizzy with the urge to Change.

  “Because when she was a kid,” Jaxon volunteered, “she followed all of us around like a little baby duck. But she never wanted to play or join in on the fun.”

  Eden arched her perfect, pretty, delicate eyebrows up to nearly her hairline. “Fun being spin the bottle in Beaston’s tree house and taking shots of your dad’s Fireball whiskey before Changing drunk and bleeding each other? No spanks.”

  “See?” Jaxon rumbled, sitting up and puffing out his chest. “Boring and annoying.” A challenge flashed in his eyes, which had lightened to an inhuman green. Smiling at Barret, Jaxon was testing him, asking for a fight.